Are These The Dumbest Criminals?
Some people would call this outrageous. Some would simply say this cannot be true. And some people will call it for what it is-some of the dumbest criminals alive! Here are some true stories about what we feel are some of the dumbest people who bring a bad reputation to criminals. To be a good criminal you have to have some smarts. We question whether these folks have any smarts at all.
Here’s what we’re talking about!
- Case number one-a pair of robbers who threatened to shoot a restaurant owner if he didn’t give them free food. He said he was too busy and asked if they could come back in an hour. They did and not unsurprisingly ended up in handcuffs. Or how about the man who walked into a discount gun store with a baseball bat. He used the baseball bat to break a gun display case to steal a gun. The owner of the store pulled a gun of his own and held the would-be burglar at bay until police arrived. Moral of the story, never try to rob a gun store with a baseball bat.In case number three our stupid criminal tries to scale a liquor store’s outside wall because the front door was locked. He falls on his rear end. He then tries to enter the liquor store from above and falls thru the roof but again ends up on his rear. After gathering the liquor that he wanted to steal, he tries to get out the front door from the inside, but it is still locked. NO GO! So he tries to jump back through the hole he made in the ceiling and again falls on his rear. The guy got frustrated, sat down, lit a cigarette and waited for the cops to show up. He get ticketed for attempted burglary while intoxicated.Then there was a story of the 17-year-old Amish youth who ran a stop sign in the latest model horse and buggy. He led police on a “low-speed chase” that lasted for a mile before he took a corner too sharply and tipped the carriage on its side. The police gave him a ticket for “over driving an animal” and apparently some other offenses.
- A pair of not too smart burglars drew disguises on their faces with permanent markers. They broke into an apartment and stole some jewelry and a handgun. They were seen leaving the apartment complex by a resident who called police. The two burglars were unable to get the disguises off of their faces because “permanent” means something. Again they were caught.
- Or how about the man who had a date with a 13-year-old girl he had been “courting” on the Internet. She didn’t show up for an arranged face-to-face meeting. He paid her ahead of time by depositing money into her account. When the teenager stood him up, he found her home phone number and called her father to demand a refund. Good luck with that pal.
- And there’s a story of a guy from North Carolina who entered an Internet café demanding money. He claimed he had a gun under his shirt. The gun turned out to be a banana which he was eating as police arrested him. Police were upset because the perp was destroying evidence.But our all-time favorite is a story about the vagrant who decided to burglarize a home with the homeowners gone. He got in all right, but because he hadn’t eaten or slept in a while he decided to make himself at home and raided the refrigerator. Nothing beats a good lunch except a good nap. He fell asleep after his lunch in the master bedroom where the homeowners found him sound asleep after they returned. Moral of that story is never burglarize a home on an empty stomach.
Have you experienced dumb criminals? Please share your experience. We want to hear your thoughts.